dirty laundry

heroes.

I'm a cranky pants today.  I noticed it around 5pm when I became irrationally angry with my boss for literally no reason.  I usually have a good reason, but not today. Heh.  He didn't know.  He might now, but he didn't then and that's what counts.  Whatever the case, during these times of clearly misguided emotions, I try to take a bit of joy in the little things and find heroes in everyday people I encounter.

1. Robert H. with Desoto Cabs -- you are my hero because yesterday when we got stuck in traffic on the way to my destination, you refused to let me pay you the full fare.  THEN, you returned with my keys that I had carelessly left in the backseat, and charged me only a fraction of the actual fare from you previous location.  That was rad and I really appreciated it.  Made my whole day a whole lot better.

2.Jesse T., my brother, your strength in the face of adversity, the way you persevere through the  shittiest of times and situations... it boggles my mind.  You are my hero for always being such an amazing parent to your children, for always taking the time to hear about my day/life/dramas/etc., for being up for a martini mid-week, for keeping the faith that all will work itself out in the end -- for better or for worse  -- and knowing it will be for better, for just being you and for being not only my brother, but my best friend.

And this is when I turn from irrationally angry girl to sappy crybaby.  Awesome.

oh fashion industry, why do you hate me?

Seriously.  Seriously!  I've spent the past three nights rushing to shopping malls after work in a desperate attempt to find new 'work' pants.  I've tried on no less than 23 pairs of pants across three different sizes, from four different stores.  Not. One. Worked.  NOT ONE!  Seriously. 

Too long, too short, too tight, too loose, too ugly, not flattering, etc.  The fashion industry must not be aware that my body type exists, or they are masochists that take joy in my frustration and misery.

Unfortunately, this does not change the fact that I need a new pair of work pants.  I really need about three new pairs, but I will settle for one.  One pair that fits my thighs and my hips, that doesn't give me a muffin top, that shows the shape of my leg with a little boot cut at the bottom (wide leg pants need not apply), that's neither too long nor too short, that has pockets on the back that are positioned correctly as to not make my ass appear wide, and that do not crumple up under the pant fabric to look just lame from the back.

Is that too much to ask? 

Stop hating me fashion industry.  My disposable income and I want to make sweet love to you.

8.

This little guy is the latest addition to the family.  Born to my cousin Jacqueline on Friday, August 8th at 9:13am.  Little Ron Dion the IV weighed in a 7lbs 6oz.  He looks peaceful, eh?

My aunt Teri called me shortly after his birth.  I could hear the joy in her voice, just so happy to be a grandma and so proud of her daughter for how strong she stayed throughout two days(!!) of labor.

Huge congratulations to everyone and welcome home to the new little guy.
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It seems sometimes that there is very little to say about me here anymore.  Lots of things going on around me, people getting married, having babies, moving away, moving home, getting sued, and so on.  For me?  all feels pretty much the same as it ever was -- still single, still working, still tired, still living in the same house, still bleh.  I want to change all that, but I'm not sure how or to what.

Maybe something drastic?  Move far away??  Quit my job??  Who knows.

random thought of the day.

20 years ago today, I broke my leg playing frisbee with my brother at summer camp, and spent 6-weeks on crutches.  I was pretty stoked to break a bone, thinking it was super cool to have a cast.  Though, spending the rest of that summer at my dad's house in 90° weather next to a gloriously inviting, but totally off limits swimming pool, was complete torture.

Not so random thoughts -- Happy Birthday to Danny (today!!) & Auntie Teri (tomorrow!!).

:) lotsa love.

cyclical.

Sometimes I feel like my life goes in one giant circle, sometimes a circle 8, but basically just repeating itself over and over.  From feeling blue about failed attempts at relationships, to excitement over a new cutie; from overworked and burnt out, to loving my job (still burnt though); from drunk to sober (that one is more rare than the others, but still worth noting); from blah blah to blah blah... seriously, it's just a huge circle.

No point here just yet, but thought I would mention the observation.  Why?  Because, clearly, of any place to babble nonsense, it's here.  Overall, I'm pretty happy with my life.  I love my job and everyone I work with, but definitely need to reduce hours.  It's redic with no end it sight.  Hmmm... that last sentence seems to apply in multiple ways.  Whatev. 

Kinda would like to see things shoot off in a totally new direction. Hmm... soon!  Maybe tomorrow.  Tonight... I will finish that bottle of wine sleep.  Yay!

boo on suckiness.

For a moment this evening, a moment that lasted longer than I might have liked, I was sad.  In fact, that same moment could have been an awesome moment, but instead is sucked.

Actually, it still sucks and I'm not totally over it.  I'm honestly feeling a bit stuck in the suckiness, but that will soon change.  I hope.  It always has in the past.  I don't see how this time would be any different.

All that emo b.s. aside, I do have to say that after taking a stroll through some photos of friends and family and seeing all the love I have in my life, I do feel a bit better.  I still kinda want to vomit, but that'll pass too.

Time for sleep.

just another day.

I work so much now that, aside from laundry and cleaning my house, I don't know what to do with myself when I have time off.  Lame.

Today, however, I took a drive up to Guerneville to drop in at a friend's art show.  I was supposed to have plans this evening, but alas those fell through -- disappointing, but far from surprising.  So... what now?  Hmm...

The flowers from my cousin's wedding back on June 14th are finally dead enough to shoot (yay!!), so I did take advantage of that...

What is this obsession I have with dead flowers? So strange. Tralala.

laundry night.

Last night was laundry night.  Usually this is pretty uneventful -- sort, walk to Brian Wash, keep fingers crossed that it isn't super busy, blah blah.  Tonight was pretty much the same, until this one dude decided it would be a great idea to wash all his clothes at once.  The good news is, he didn't have that many clothes to wash, but that's... umm... also the bad news.

He was standing at a washer about four feet to my right  when I saw his shirt come off.  Odd, I thought, and went back to editing wedding photos.  Then he momentarily disappeared from my line of sight... only to reappear adjusting a thin blue towel around his waist.

Ok, now I'm paying attention.

He wasn't a small man, standing about 6'3", beer gut, and -- oh yes -- plumber's crack (hot! -- no not really.).  Towel man walked outside for a smoke and a chat on his cell phone.  Upon return is when he started acting a bit erratically (because doing one's laundry practically naked in a public laundromat still isn't *that *strange for San Francisco).

Anyway, big surprise(!), turns out the guy wasn't so mentally stable.  I know you're shocked.  He seemed somewhat aware of it, if only in brief moments of clarity.  I actually felt rather bad for him.  Can't be easy having only one outfit to wear, and I appreciate that he wanted that outfit to be clean.

Evidently, he made some people a bit uncomfortable and the staff was soon asking him to put some clothes on.  They finally offered something to wear from the lost and found bin, which he gratefully accepted and returned sporting an awesome royal blue Hawaiian shirt with colorful surfboards all over it and some cargo shorts.

Anyway, it sure made laundry night more interesting.

So, life has been pretty good.  Still working more than is probably healthy, but it's kinda fun.  Still not-dating-but-whatever the same boy for nearly 7-months (no wonder how I got to be 31 and single!).   My roommate may be moving out come September and, although I'll miss her like crazy, I'm looking forward to having my own place.  Starting to re-sort my photography portfolio... maybe I'll really make a go of it this time!

Oh! A HUGE congratulations to my friends Mie & Robby who welcomed their son Gus Koichi Carballer into the world this past Sunday, June 29th. He's perfect and precious.

Tralalala... and the beat goes on.

all day in bed.

Get your mind out the gutter!  It's not that kind of all day in bed.  I wish.  Turns out my allergies went south and took up semi-perm residence in my lungs.  Good times!  Lots of tea with honey, Emergen-C (thanks Leila!), cough meds, and inhalers... I'm all drugged up and feeling better than when I woke up.

The New Kids on the Block -- yes, I said it -- are keeping me super entertained.  Music videos, the making of music videos, ringtones, the new song on repeat... one might say that I'm still a little bit more than totally fanatical about them, and I do still [heart] Donnie.

I really can't explain it.  Honestly, I thought all of this was part of my past, but oh how wrong I was.  Cristina, my fellow New Kids fanatic and BFF, tivo'd their Today Show appearance.  I was at her house as soon as I could get off of work.  We must have watched and rewatched a dozen or so times, pausing the action to check out Jon's bubble butt, and to catch whether Donnie had a ring on that special finger (he doesn't!!). 

Like 13 year old girls we danced around the living room, screaming "OMG! He so hot!!" and the less PG version of, "The things I would do to that boy!"  It's amazing to see how little has changed in 15 years (gawd I'm getting old).

Have no doubts that we will be at the San Jose show, and maybe even the one in Vegas too!  OOOoooooh.. I can't wait!  I'll be the girl sporting the shirt that reads Donnie's Home Girl!  Pretty rad... I know.  Don't hate.  :)

Button: I still [heart] Donnie! -- available from Spunky Girl Designs.

silly emo.

My dad once told me that a beer commercial made him cry.  In his defense, it was quite touching --- set in the bleacher section of a baseball game, a little old man, eyes tightly shut, holds up his tattered baseball glove in vain hope of catching a home run, when the frat boy behind him notices, catches the home run and puts in the little guy's glove making him believe he caught it.

Told ya it was touching.  So, as it turns out, I inherited his sappy penchant for crying over... well, nothing really.

Case in point: Today, the Chronicle/SFGate ran an article about tourist spending in SF (evidently it's up).  I clicked through a couple of photos of tourists from all over the US, smiling ear to ear while enjoying Cable Car rides across the City.  Seemingly benign, right?  Well, not so much, as my little jaded heart suddenly started to get all warm and fuzzy, and tears welled up in my eyes (it's happening again as I type this).  I didn't actually cry, but had to immediately close the browser window before I did.

Thanks Dad!  I may sound like I'm complaining, but I don't mind being a sap.  I cry at everything... Thanksgiving when Mom makes us all stand in a circle telling each other what we're grateful for (gets me everytime!), weddings (even those of people I don't know and not always because I'm the sad single girl), graduations (every graduation I've ever had or been too for a friend)... I even cried once after finishing a final exam, though that might have been more out of relief than sappiness. 

Oh silly me.  Good to know I'm not alone in this one though.

Photo: My silly nephew.   The  jury is still out, but he may have inherited this trait as well.  He's got a sweet little compassionate heart.